A Battle Worth Fighting
standing firm while remaining soft
In sixth grade, I punched a boy, and I think it surprised me most.
The boy was fine, but for a brief moment after the blow, the world went into slow motion. We stared at each in disbelief. I was five foot nothing, barely pushing one hundred pounds, and not prone to fighting. I liked to keep my anger locked tight.
But not that day. That day it burned all the way down to my fist. And in the aftermath, as other kids started to laugh and chant “Float like a butterfly, Sting like a bee!” heat flooded my cheeks.
I don’t know why I hit him. I don’t know what pushed me past the edge of tolerance. All I know is that as I walked away, shame had lodged itself in my body, burning somewhere between my throat and my chest. I wished the whole thing had never happened, because while I did not regret standing up for myself, I knew there was a better way to fight. I knew the moment my fist hit his stomach, it wasn’t me.
But knowing how to fight well is tricky business in a world where quiet strength often goes unnoticed. Bold opinions get ovations while peaceful silence gets pushed into the shadows. The fruit of the Spirit seems to get chewed up and spit out.
I often feel too soft in a world that demands iron in your veins.
But I keep reminding myself:
Your gentleness is not a liability.
Oh, no. Your gentleness may just be your greatest weapon.
Because like Jesus himself, who often chose silence in the face of accusation, true strength does not demand that we clench our fists but rather, that we learn how to stand firm while remaining tender.
With that comes tension, nuance, and a fog of gray—and that can be difficult to navigate. I get it. Truly.
But if you are going to fight for anything, fight for your softness.
Fight for a way of being in the world that doesn’t push people to their corners. Fight to remain open to people and to find acceptable outlets for your anger that doesn’t create human casualties along the way.
Because your gentleness is not a liability, but an invitation. Your softness is something worth fighting for.
grace + peace,
Sarah
PS: I borrowed today’s letter from an Instagram post. While I try to keep things here fresh and new, I wanted this story to have a more permanent place, and perhaps I am not the only one who needs the invitation to stay tender.
Good Things to Pick Up
a short list of books, quotes, movies, and more that are pointing me back to the goodness of God and warmth of his welcome
An Episode
Mind the Gap - a sermon from Pastor Steve DeNeff about lingering in the liminal spaces of our lives.
A Book
Gentle and Lowly: The Heart of Christ for Sinners and Sufferers by Dane C. Ortland
A Recipe
Pumpkin Chili - from A Savory Life (because I’m declaring it fall. it’s happening.)
Community Question
My mind has been ablaze with ideas for new content offerings that explore faith and belonging, and I want to get your input. You can cast your vote below or go rogue and add a suggestion in the comments. Thanks in advance!
Love this content! Also love how you integrated it re IG. 🤓
“But if you are going to fight for anything, fight for your softness.
Fight for a way of being in the world that doesn’t push people to their corners. Fight to remain open to people and to find acceptable outlets for your anger that doesn’t create human casualties along the way.”
Oh how this speaks to something deep within me. Thank you for these words today!