Baby Babies & Book Babies

Oh, hey. Hi. It's been awhile.

Yesterday, one of our middle kids turned thirteen, which means half of our boys are now officially teenagers. They are no longer baby-babies, which comes with a little dash of freedom for me. Our oldest knows how to use the air fryer like a champ, and all four boys are capable of taking showers, putting on clothes, putting away laundry, and making their beds. (PRAISE.) But like so many things in life these days, I keep looking around at my life and thinking, “How did we get here?”

summer walks are essential around here

Time is slippery. Over the last year, so much has changed and at the same time grown smaller. I’m increasingly less and less compelled to stretch myself in ways I was not meant to stretch. Sure, many days still leave me weary. I always have one (or two or three) to-do lists hanging on our kitchen cabinets. I get sad or spicy while watching the news. We have four boys moving quickly in four directions, so our pace is rarely slow. But I am slow to say yes to the extras. I have drawn tighter circles around myself, my people, the way I go about my days, not because I want to be closed off but I crave a life that is substantive. I want to hold fast to the things that are mine to do and let the rest fall away.

A year ago today, I published my first book The Way of Belonging, and after those initial months of podcast interviews and being more present on social media, I sensed the need to keep the conversations going but in a different way. “Smaller,” life whispered from every direction, and I would raise my eyebrows and ask, “Are you sure?” It made no earthly sense to pull back from mainstream publicity and the podcast only months after my book arrived on shelves, but I knew in that capital-K knowing kind of way of the soul that smaller was essential.

So I have been quiet here on the internet. The podcast took a lengthy pause. A few people reached out to say, “Uhm…are you okay? You’ve been quiet.” (And that kindness was appreciated. It’s nice to be noticed, maybe even more so in our absence.) But this is a quiet that I chose. In my own little sphere, I have been waiting, watching, working behind the scenes and every day, with every breath contemplating a smaller way and asking, “God, what is mine to do?”

I have quite a bit rattling around inside me. I have new things ahead, and things I am getting excited to begin again. I have words I have been holding rather close.

But today I simply want to say hello to you, dear reader. I want you to know that in my quiet, I have been thinking of you. (And if you’re new here, welcome! I am glad our paths could cross.) I also want to mark the day that our sweet boy became a teen and my book made its first lap around the sun. I want to carve out a little space to let these things matter and invite you to do the same.

The Way of Belonging has not been a bestseller. It didn’t win any awards or top any charts, but every so often, I get a message from someone equally tired of trying to find the perfect place or the perfect people and needed a gentler way for belonging in the world. For a few moments, we find a little something of ourselves in each other’s stories, and while perhaps small on the grand scale of our existence, these tiny overlaps are far from flimsy. Quantity is not a good measure for quality. Small things are substantive too.

I plan to share more in the days to come, but for now, I’d love to hear about the small things that you are celebrating or enjoying in your little patch of earth. Where you are finding moments of delight, even as you wonder, “God, what is mine to do?”

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A Virtual Retreat Opportunity

In just over a week (June 20-22), I am joining

Kimberly Phinney

and the Way Back to Ourselves community for CULTIVATE 2025, a virtual retreat for creatives, writers, and leaders of all kinds. This year’s theme is Unrelenting Hope, and each session (from craft to spiritual healing to publishing) focuses on how this strand of hope fuels, inspires, and widens how we embrace what is ours to do in the world. On Saturday, June 21, I’ll be presenting “Belonging Right Where You Are,” providing a gentler way to pursue belonging as well as some reflective practices you can take with you.

If the retreat sounds like something that would be life-giving, I would love for you to join us. You can purchase your virtual retreat ticket online through June 15, 2025, which will give you access to both live viewing and recordings (if you cannot be there in real time). For more info, check out the link below.