How is Your Soul?

and other questions I'm carrying into launch week

Toward the end of last week, Matthew (a lovely internet friend) asked a question that made me pause.

The closer the calendar inches toward the release of The Way of Belonging, the more people have been asking how I am doing. And, kind of like someone remembering it’s your birthday, each ask has been unexpected and kind. But Matthew tacked on a second question to his “how are you?” He added, “...and how is your soul?”

I leaned against my kitchen island and stared at his question on my phone.

“How IS my soul?” I wondered, taking a few extra moments to close my eyes and consider, to let my chest rise and fall.

While I knew my fast answers to his first question (tired, excited, ready…), I knew the second question required a little more contemplation. Asking about the condition of one’s soul is like asking me about the box labeled “memories” I keep toward the back of the storage room. While sacred, it’s not always visible, easily accessible, or front of mind. Access requires a little more digging, a little more patience as I clear away all the clutter I tend to pile around it as I go about my days.

“How is your soul?” invited me into a much-needed pause.

the actual clutter inhabiting my desk these days

One thing I’ve discovered in the midst of writing and releasing a book is that there is no hiding from my humanity. I have felt fully alive throughout portions of the process, but I have been equally confronted by the less-than-lovely parts of myself. If you read the book, you will learn that I have a history of letting my work and my worth get tangled. I can easily let my sense of belonging hinge upon outcomes and acceptance. So you can probably imagine how releasing a book is ripe with opportunities to rely too heavily upon the metrics and to strive.

All my old ghosts seem out to haunt me, and without awareness of what lingers beneath the surface of things, without friends helping me keep one ear to the ground, how easily I fall back into my old ways of being, ways that left me more lost than found.

So I am keeping Matthew’s question close. I am holding “how is your soul?” out in front of me like a filter, helping me stay steady as I consider what is mine to hold with joy and celebration and what is mine to simply let go. Because whether I’m ready or not, the time to pry my fingers off this thing is here. It’s time to let The Way of Belonging grow its own legs and meander into the right hands and homes.

They call it “release day” for a reason. 

Because . . . the book is going to do what the book is going to do, and my work is not to manage outcomes but to unfurl my fingers, breathe deep, and be attentive to the rumblings of the soul.

For the sake of putting all our questions out on the table, here are a few other questions that are helping me be mindful of my internal landscape and listen to the nudges of God in these days and weeks:

• What do I want in this season?

• What do I need? (And with what can I ask for help?)

• Where do I sense God’s invitation?

• How am I responding to the people around me? And what does that tell me?

• What might it be like to receive goodness, without holding on too tightly?

Feel free to borrow these questions or add your own.

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And one more thing . . .

I find I cannot say “thank you” enough these days. So I’m going to do it again (and it probably will not be the last time). The Way of Belonging is officially out in the world tomorrow (June 11), and I want you to know that I have received every direct message, share, pre-order, like, high five, and hold at the library with so much gratitude. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

“wide open welcome,” a postcard print of original oil pastel by Kristin Vanderlip

I put together a small pre-order thank-you with the help of artist

Kristin Vanderlip

. You can get a high-res copy of “wide open welcome” to print and display, along with a few other extras. You can claim the pre-order gifts by filling out this form before June 15, 2024. And I hope that, in some way, the words and images remind you of the divine welcome already within you, nestled in the sacred center of your soul.