This reminds me of how Parker Palmer compares the soul to a wild creature, easily overlooked or scared away by loud or sudden movements and how the way to draw near is to be very still.
I love this, Sarah. It resonates with me...especially this struggle of “who am I when I have nothing to show?” But letting go does sound like an appealing way forward in that. Thanks for sharing.
The summer was busy. Tech job and companies building and installing. Makes my tech job busy. Also markets for my art, and trying to keep ahead. I want to go dormant like the trees. Slow down. Create for love and fun. Get my head out of the vendor space into a quiet, slow arts place.
"I'm afraid that if I stop talking, I will be forgotten." This line hit me like a brick. It's the silent fear that nibbles at the edges of our minds, especially in the age of constant connection. We equate visibility with value, and the thought of stepping back feels like disappearing entirely. It's a battle I'm constantly wrestling with myself.
Well you are certainly not alone in equating “visibility with value” (I love how you phrased that). I have been surprised by the number of times since backing off from online life that I have felt like moments must be shared publicly. Like…but how will people know?! I’m trying to practice, instead, just pausing in whatever it is. To savor a little with my senses and hold it close. But goodness….that knee jerk reaction to post something to Insta is STRONG.
Certainly a struggle. My therapist is always asking me, 'but what if you didn't (hold all of these things...or just let that one go...or that one)? Thank you for your words and encouragement. It's affirming to know we are just like our brothers and sisters in these ways. I, also, struggle with feeling seen yet know 'behind the scenes' the things I'm working on are so important and necessary in the small community God is using me to minister; the affirmation from him is real...yet, this inner tension is real, too. Grateful for you.
Your words are so relatable here, Sarah. More and more, I'm convinced that obscurity is a spiritual practice, and that it's a worthy endeavor to engage in it for a time. I hope you feel the freedome to lean into it for a while, and that your soul would find some much needed refreshment!
"But what if what we perceive as falling apart is in fact a falling open?" Beautiful, friend. Thanks for this and for the reminder that there is sacredness to be found in the small, hidden things.
This touched me so deeply, Sarah. I have found the inspiration of letting things fall away in so many places this autumn. Thank you for reminding me once again to simply surrender. 🍁
Thank you, Sarah, for your honesty and relatability. It’s so easy to get sucked in to the world’s expectations and feel pressured to do all the things, all the time.
I love that you’re loving your son’s marching band. It was a 10-year season of our lives and we loved it too. Anyway, I always thrilled at the bands’ big explosive sound after the very quiet pieces. Maybe that’s a lesson for us. Our best might also come after a rest or time of silence.
So, go ahead. Take a beat. We’ll still be here cheering you on when you pick up the tempo again.
This reminds me of how Parker Palmer compares the soul to a wild creature, easily overlooked or scared away by loud or sudden movements and how the way to draw near is to be very still.
I love this, Sarah. It resonates with me...especially this struggle of “who am I when I have nothing to show?” But letting go does sound like an appealing way forward in that. Thanks for sharing.
PS. Love you lots.
Lots of love right back at ya 😘
I enjoyed this and felt the same when autumn arrived. I wrote a poem about it. I’m thinking I’ll post the poem next week. Blessings.
I hope you do! what do you think is beneath your own inclination to let go?
The summer was busy. Tech job and companies building and installing. Makes my tech job busy. Also markets for my art, and trying to keep ahead. I want to go dormant like the trees. Slow down. Create for love and fun. Get my head out of the vendor space into a quiet, slow arts place.
https://elmerperry.substack.com/p/the-trees-of-autumn?utm_source=substack&utm_content=feed%3Arecommended%3Acopy_link
"I'm afraid that if I stop talking, I will be forgotten." This line hit me like a brick. It's the silent fear that nibbles at the edges of our minds, especially in the age of constant connection. We equate visibility with value, and the thought of stepping back feels like disappearing entirely. It's a battle I'm constantly wrestling with myself.
Well you are certainly not alone in equating “visibility with value” (I love how you phrased that). I have been surprised by the number of times since backing off from online life that I have felt like moments must be shared publicly. Like…but how will people know?! I’m trying to practice, instead, just pausing in whatever it is. To savor a little with my senses and hold it close. But goodness….that knee jerk reaction to post something to Insta is STRONG.
Certainly a struggle. My therapist is always asking me, 'but what if you didn't (hold all of these things...or just let that one go...or that one)? Thank you for your words and encouragement. It's affirming to know we are just like our brothers and sisters in these ways. I, also, struggle with feeling seen yet know 'behind the scenes' the things I'm working on are so important and necessary in the small community God is using me to minister; the affirmation from him is real...yet, this inner tension is real, too. Grateful for you.
I love that question from your therapist: "But what if you didn't..." I might have to borrow that.
Beautiful. “If the soul had a color palette, autumn would be mine, and year after year, I breathe it in.” Me too.
Seriously. It's the best.
Your words are so relatable here, Sarah. More and more, I'm convinced that obscurity is a spiritual practice, and that it's a worthy endeavor to engage in it for a time. I hope you feel the freedome to lean into it for a while, and that your soul would find some much needed refreshment!
"obscurity is a spiritual practice" oooof. That'll preach, Sarah.
I’ve been thinking and dreaming about these words from a poem by Gideon Heugh in his poetry collection, Naming God. He advises ...
Let your being breathe.
Make space for time; make time for space;
Create continuums of soulfulness.
This is what I crave. This feels like the medicine I need.
Beautiful. "Let your being breathe." I can almost feel myself exhale.
"But what if what we perceive as falling apart is in fact a falling open?" Beautiful, friend. Thanks for this and for the reminder that there is sacredness to be found in the small, hidden things.
I needed this today. Thank you, Sarah.
This touched me so deeply, Sarah. I have found the inspiration of letting things fall away in so many places this autumn. Thank you for reminding me once again to simply surrender. 🍁
I'm glad it resonated :)
Thank you, Sarah, for your honesty and relatability. It’s so easy to get sucked in to the world’s expectations and feel pressured to do all the things, all the time.
I love that you’re loving your son’s marching band. It was a 10-year season of our lives and we loved it too. Anyway, I always thrilled at the bands’ big explosive sound after the very quiet pieces. Maybe that’s a lesson for us. Our best might also come after a rest or time of silence.
So, go ahead. Take a beat. We’ll still be here cheering you on when you pick up the tempo again.
Thanks, Linda. It’s been a sweet season for sure.
this was a lovely read...am I grasping for attention instead of paying attention? Thanks for this nudge!
Beautiful